This is one of my favorite times of the year! In case you’re asking yourself, “It’s August, what the heck is she talking about?” then let me explain.
Two words: Fair Food.
I live in the Midwest and our state fairs have some of the wildest food you could ever imagine. Most of the concoctions sound so delicious, it’s like you’ve died and gone to heaven, while other crazy creations make my stomach turn just thinking about them. Would you like examples? Of course you would.
We’ll go in alphabetical order by State because I like to be all organizational.
California State Fair:
—Deep-fried bacon-wrapped Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. Hell yeah. I would absolutely eat that without a second thought. I’m a fan of bacon. Which is good, because a fair amount of items on this list involve bacon in some form.
—Captain Crunch Chicken Sandwich. Captain crunch cereal appears to be mixed with slow cooked pulled chicken! Looks disgusting. No thank you, California. I’ll pass on this delicacy.
Iowa State Fair:
—Apple Taco. Apple taco is a soft shelled tortilla deep fat fried sprinkled with cinnamon/sugar filled with granny smith apples topped with whip cream and caramel. Absolutely YES to this one. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m a sucker for anything deep fried.
–Sweet Potato Totchos. Sweet potato tater tots with a marshmallow and caramel sauce drizzled over top. The Sweet Potato TotChos are a dessert alternative. While I’m all for name-blending celebrity couples, I’m not sure I’m down with the tot/nacho combo of a totcho. I absolutely DESPISE sweet potatoes so this would make me run far and fast in the other direction.
Minnesota State Fair
—Duck Bacon Wontons. Duck bacon, grilled sweet corn, and cream cheese combined inside deep fried wontons served with dipping sauce. This sounds gross, too. Is it bacon made out of duck meat? I love ducks and I would feed them bread if I saw them in the park. I don’t want to EAT them. Also, I don’t know how corn fits into the mix. Pass!
–Cheesy Nacho Corn on the Cob: Roasted corn on the cob lightly coated with crushed Dorito® corn chips and nacho cheese. For some reason, I have a feeling this would taste absolutely horrible, but that would NOT prevent me from trying it. The cheesy sauce on top would probably be a bit of overkill.
—Memphis Totchos: Sliced bananas and sautéed bacon over tator tots topped with peanut sauce. I would also have to kindly decline on this one. You lost me at bananas, tator tots, and peanut sauce. Can I just pick the bacon out and eat that? And what’s with the TOTCHOS? Two different state fairs have them, so I’m assuming this isn’t a regional thing. I must live under a rock if I’ve never heard of the Totcho.
New Jersey Fair:
—Fried Bubble Gum. I don’t even need to see a picture to know that there’s no way in Hell I’m going to EAT bubble gum. Not even if you deep fry it. Not even if you wrap it in bacon (although there’s no bacon with the gum, I just thought I’d throw that out there.)
New York State Fair:
—The Pig Out. It starts with deep-fried bacon that gets coated in Doritos. Then it’s fried again and topped with a chipotle sauce and cheese. While I’m kind of excited for the double deep fry technique, the cheese and chipotle sauce would put the nail in that coffin. I’m not a fan of sauces.
Texas State Fair:
This is a giant disappointment because there were NO pictures on the website. Nor were there any details or descriptions of the food. So many unanswered questions! However, the food listed on the site pretty much blew my mind.
—Deep Fried Froot Loops. I can’t even imagine how you’d do this. NO!
—Deep Fried Chicken Noodle Soup on a Stick. I definitely need more information on this one. But, yeah, I’d get this without a second thought. Come on, people…it’s CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP! So healthy!
—Fried Texas Dirt. Um…I’m assuming this isn’t real dirt…but what IS it then??
—Oreo Beer. HELL YEAH. This is perhaps my favorite of every food I’ve listed. I want this. Sooooo badly!
—Ramen Grasshopper Cookie. Is this a cookie made of real grasshopper bugs and ramen noodles? What in heaven’s name would make a person decide to combine those items?
Wisconsin State Fair:
—Monkey Business. You’ll go bananas for our caramelized banana burrito! Stuffed with house-made bacon jam and creamy peanut butter, then deep fried, drizzled with Wisconsin honey, and finished with a sprinkle of chipotle cinnamon sugar – this funky monkey means business! Yeah, I’d have to try this one, simply for the chipotle cinnamon sugar. I’m intrigued!!!
—Three Little Pigs Ravioli. Completely noodleless, handmade bacon ravioli stuffed with 3 different styles of pork! 6 slices of handwoven bacon stuffed with homemade bourbon bacon jam, house smoked pulled pork shoulder, and pancetta. Complemented by cream cheese, Wisconsin smoked gouda, scallions, onion and brown sugar. Served with homemade cherry bourbon bacon BBQ jam. Hmm. That sounds like it has a LOT going on. Too many flavors would assault my senses.
—Unicorn Twinkie. Deep-fried twinkie with cotton candy filling topped with bright pink and blue icing with edible glitter sprinkles. I think I just threw up in my mouth from reading that description. PASS!
There you have it, folks. If you’re looking to fill up on high calorie, high fat, extremely unique fair foods, you’ve got a list of delicacies to get you started!
What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten? Was it disgusting or did you fall in love with the flavor sensation? I’m always looking for suggestions…
As always, have a great day and thanks for reading!